What's in Your Prize Box...

I love giving out prizes to kids.  I don't do it all the time, but every once in a while I get out the prize box and the we'll play a game where the winning team gets to choose something from it.  It's fun and that kids love it.  But I have learned a few things about the prize box over the years.  In fact, I have discovered that there are some definite do's and don'ts when it comes to what should go into it.  Here are a couple rules of thumb that I use to keep the prize box from becoming a problem in my own
ministry.

No Weapons
This might seem like a little thing, but for some families this is a big issue.  They don't want their children playing even with pretend guns or knives.  Another issue is that some children live in worlds were guns and knives play an all too real role in their everyday lives and so they are not something to make light of.  Just because your child understands that guns are not toys may not mean that the child next door has the same understanding.  So, the best choice is just not to include any sort of weapon type toy in the prize box.  

No Makeup
Little girls love makeup.  But not all parents are okay with letting them even pretend to wear it.  Lip gloss is fine for one child and not allowed for another.  So in my prize box, we don't put any sort of makeup (pretend or otherwise).   

Keep an eye on what your kids choose
There is always a toy that everyone wants, and there is equally always a toy that stays unchosen in the prize box.  Keep track of what is popular so that you don't spend money on things that no one wants.  In one church I was at, I couldn't keep bubbles in the box because they were always taken, in another church, they would sit in the box untouched.  Every place is different, so keep yours stocked accordingly.

Variety
Make sure that your box is contains something for everyone.  In my box, I have toy cars, perhaps a stuffed animal, small notebooks, bubbles, puzzles, etc.  I recently found watercolor painting books at Michael's that are a lot of fun and were only $1. Keeping a variety of toys makes it more fun for the kids to choose.

There is rarely a prize in my prize box that costs more than $1, so every few weeks I'll buy 3-5 things to add to it.  Spending $5 a month isn't a huge expense, but it adds a lot to our ministry with the kids.  I just try to be careful about what I spend that money on.

Until next week!       

But...We've Never Done It That Way Before

Change is hard.  Ministry is hard.  And trying to implement change into ministry can be incredibly difficult.  One of the biggest mistakes that people can make in ministry is to change lots of stuff all at once.  Even if you've been at the same church for ten years...change it not easy.  People expect some change when a new person comes into the department.  I've talked about that in this previous post.  But you may decide to implement something brand new long after you are no longer "new" and that has it's own challenges.  Below are a few suggestions that you might find helpful.


Why was it not changed before now?
I like trying new things, and if you are talking about something small, then it may not matter.  After all, if you're church has had chocolate chip cookies for snack at VBS for the last 30 years then maybe it's time for a change.  However, sometimes even those small things carry way more baggage than you might realize at first glance.  Perhaps the reason those cookies are always made is because Sister Cook's-A-Lot made them every year for 25 years and when she passed away she left the recipe and the funds to cover the making of said cookies for the next 20 years in her will.  Trying to change that tradition will be more difficult...after all, now there are funds literally set aside for those cookies that you would have to find elsewhere if you decided not to make them.  I know that is an extreme scenario, but it's not really out of the realm of possibility.  I once had someone absolutely irate at me to the point of not talking to me for quite some time over where we were going to purchase chicken for a dinner.  Make sure you know why something has always been done before you change it.  A little research can save you a lot of grief.

Is it needed?
I am not saying that it's not good to change things up from time to time, but if you are making a major change (and the definition of major changes differs from church to church), be sure you can explain why you feel the change in necessary.  "Because I want to" probably isn't going to work very well.  Have a well thought out explanation for what you are trying to change and why it you feel it is necessary. 

Include your Team
Big changes often take a lot of planning and a lot of work.  Don't decide to revamp the entire way you are doing children's church without talking through it with your team.  You may be the one who makes the final call, but they have to help you implement the plan.  If you are adding all sorts of work to their duties, changing what they will be responsible for, or even adding an extra piece to the service structure, make sure you include them in the conversation.  If they are on board, half the battle is over, but if they are not with you, you are sunk before you begin.  Plus, they will have insights that you might not have noticed or thought about in your planning phase.  They are on your team for a reason...include them in the process.   

Cover Everything in Prayer
Make sure God is the center of whatever changes you make.  If it is His plan, it will prosper...if it's your plan and He's not leading, it will fail.  It really is that simple.

Sometimes changes are necessary, but if you use these few suggestions, walking through those changes, it can make the path much smoother.

Until next week!   

When Holidays are Hard...

We are coming upon Mother's Day soon after that Father's Day.  Later on we'll have Grandparent's Day.  In Children's Ministry these sort of holiday's can be difficult to walk through because there are such changing dynamics within the families.  Some children don't have just one Mom, but they also have Step-Mom, or Grandma, or Foster Mom, or perhaps no Mom in the picture at all if Mom has died or left the family.  It is often a similar situation when it comes to Dad or Grandparents.   So how do we celebrate these holidays when the situations are so diverse?  Below are a couple of ideas that you might find helpful.

Either no gift or lots of gifts
Too many times anymore our children either have no Mom/Dad/Grandparent or they have many of them.  For those children who, for example, live with Grandma but will see Mom and perhaps even Step-Mom on Mother's Day, to make just one gift makes them choose (in their mind) which one they "love" most because only one can get the gift they made.  So, to alleviate that issue, there are really only two options:

1) Make a gift, but make sure there are enough supplies and time for each child to make as many as they need.
2) Do not make any sort of tangible gift, but encourage the children to do something nice for their Mom/Dad/Grandparent(s). Have them think of something that they can do on their own to show their appreciation, but give examples like taking out the trash or doing the dishes without being told, making a card for them, learn a new game with them, etc.   

Make you celebrations inclusive of all aspects of the holiday
For example, if you are doing a Father's Day lesson with the children, include the importance of Step-Dad's, Grandpa's, Foster Dad's, or even Father figures in general.  There are many people in the Scripture who were given advice from those not related to them, but who cared about them.   Or perhaps this year, we discuss the God the Father and what it means when we call God "our Father." However you decide to celebrate the day, make sure you incorporate all the people who may be filling that role for your children. 

Holidays that hinge on a family member who may or may not be around are tricky, but hopefully these tips make planning for the day a little easier.  

Have a blessed week!

 

Fundraisers

I will be the first to admit fundraisers are not my favorite things.  In fact, I don't think anyone really loves doing them.  When I started in ministry, I made the choice that I would not ever ask the children in my department to go out and sell something.  They do that at school, they do it for their sport leagues, they shouldn't have to do it for church.  And I know the feeling of seeing a child come up with an order blank wanting me to buy something and I can not because I simply don't have the funds to do so.  I don't want to be the reason that someone is put in that position at church.  But we have to raise funds right?  So, what to do?  Here are a couple things that we have done that has worked and yet, hopefully kept people from being put "on the spot".

Make a meal
Many people in my church go out to eat on Sundays.  So, twice a year at my church, we provide a meal after the morning worship service. Soups are always a big hit and we provide several choices for people.  Last time we had four types of soups (all homemade), several sandwich options (including a create your own sandwich bar), dessert, and a beverage.  We have done baked potatoes instead of sandwiches, but the sandwiches are much easier unless you have multiple ovens in which to bake potatoes or keep them warm.  Remember, you can't sell food unless you have a license but donations are fine.  If you have people who are willing to donate food for the event, this can be a wonderful fundraiser.  Plus, the people enjoy being able to sit and fellowship with their church family after the morning worship service.


A Lemonade Stand
I got this idea from another Children's Pastor friend.  For one month in the summer, near the parking lot of our church, we set up a lemonade stand and as people go to their cars, they can pick up a cup of lemonade and sometimes a sweet treat as well.  We put out a donation jar and it's a wonderful way to connect with people, but it's not pushy at all.  And the kids get a kick out of putting out the "orders".  It's a fun and simple way to raise funds.

Ongoing Donation Jar 
Have a place where people can always leave a donation if they so desire.  When I was in high school, we had a large water bottle that sat in the church foyer to raise funds for Nazarene Youth Congress.  It was a great, no pressure, way to raise funds because it simply just sat out in the foyer.  Theft was prevented because the top was too small for the money to be taken out of by hand, it was always in a public location when it was out, and it was locked up between services.  People don't always have a check book handy, but they do generally have some change in their pockets.  This is an easy way for that change to help your ministry.

Yard Sale
I have seen this done a couple of different ways.  In one, people donate items for a yard sale that is run by the Children's Department.  In another version, people purchased table space for their own yard sale at the church.  Either way can be a great fundraiser. 

There are lots of other fundraisers that are out there and lots of ways to do them.  Hopefully these give you a starting point.

Have a blessed week!

 

Stress Relief...

Any kind of ministry is stressful.  There is always something waiting to be done, someone you need to contact, a schedule to prepare, a meeting to attend, and the list goes on an on.  When you add to that the normal stresses of life and family, you can easily feel overwhelmed.  For me, there is an added component in that I have a neuromuscular disorder that will flair up if I am under too much stress.  So believe me when I say that it is important that you find ways to relieve stress because it can do a lot of damage to your physical and mental well being.   I am not a doctor, but because of my own situation, I have had to find things that help me relieve stress in order to be able to function normally.  So below are a few things that have helped me to keep my stress levels at a reasonable level.  Perhaps they can be of use to you as well.

Remember Who is really in charge
We often try to do everything ourselves.  We want all our ducks in a row and when things don't go according to plan we can get very put out.  But, here is the thing, no matter how much we try to control everything around us, there is always going to be something else that we wish we could change or that we wish were different.   Keep reminding yourself that God is in charge and you are a tool for Him to use, but you are not the whole toolbox.  You are not meant to do everything.  Keep up with your devotions and prayer time so that you keep your focus on the right things.  This one thing, in itself, will do wonders for keeping your stress levels at bay.
 
Take your day off
I have mentioned this is other blogs, but it is too important not to repeat.  You are not superhuman and your body needs time to rest.  So, make sure you take your day off.  And make sure that at least part of that day is indeed restful.  I know people who pack so much into their "day off" that it's actually more busy than a work day.  Those are fine sometimes because, after all, there are things that must be done, but being overly busy on every day off is not giving your body and mind the rest it needs.  If nothing else, set aside a couple hours for something that you enjoy and find restful.  That will be different for everyone.  Some people love gardening and find it refreshing and rejuvenating to do so.  For others, being in a garden is just hard work.  Similarly, for some sitting down and reading a book or watching a tv show is relaxing, but for others, they need to be moving to be able to relax.  The important thing is that you find something that you find restful and make sure to include that into your schedule regularly.  

Laugh
Laughter is a great stress reliever.  Take the time to laugh with your family and friends.  Life is a serious prospect, but don't be too serious.  Have fun. 

Find a hobby
This sort of goes back to taking your day off, but it is important that there is something you like to do that is outside of work and family.  Whether it is bicycling, reading, fishing, playing a video game, or some other activity, it is important that you have a hobby that you can do to unwind. 

Cultivate friendships
Our friends are an important part of our lives.  Don't let your friendships continually take the backseat in your life. There are three or four women in my life who are my confidants and supporters, but are also willing to tell me what I need to hear even when I don't want to hear it. It is important that I stay connected to those women.  You don't have to see people every day to keep a friendship strong.  Two of my very closest friends live literally hundreds of miles from me, but because of phone calls, texts, and social media, we are as close as we ever were.  Don't let friendships fall by the wayside.  They are vital to our well being. 

Everyone deals with stress a bit differently, but hopefully these tips are as helpful to you as they have been to me.

Until next week! 
  

Music and Motions...

I love music.  I was a music major in college.  I know how powerful it can be as a teaching tool.  And I love using motions in music.  Not everyone does and that's ok.  We must all lead worship the way that works best for us.  But I want to share why I feel motions are so important in children's worship.

Motions help memorization in young learners
When I lead worship, I have children as young as 3 and as old at 12 in the service.  That means that a large group of the children in the service either can not read yet, or can not read fast enough to follow the words on the screen.  Motions help them remember the words to the song.  I tend to use the same motion for certain words in nearly every song we do.  So, for example, if we do a motion for "Jesus" in one song, it will probably be the same motion in another song.  The same goes for words like "Mighty", "Strong", or a lot of other common phrases in music.  Those who can not read, can remember those motions and it helps them to learn the music.

Motions create more freedom in worship
How many times have you been sitting in an adult worship service and you don't feel like you can even lift your hands in praise because...well...no one else is lifting their hands.  We feel like we must fit a certain mold when we sing.  Motions encourage movement.  It's not just "dancing", it's freely using our bodies in worship.  Children NEED to move and using motions gives them that opportunity, but still in a somewhat structured way.

Motions teach leadership skills to older children
I know that probably sounds like an odd thing to say, but it's true.  As kids get older, sometimes they start to feel like they are "too old" for motions.  But this is an opportunity to teach them about being leaders.  It's not about "THEM".  The younger kids need the motions in order to learn and remember the songs (see above) and the older kids need to be involved so that the younger kids don't feel out of place or strange for enjoying the motions. Our older kids need opportunities to be examples of leadership and this is just such an opportunity.


I am a huge advocate of motions in music.  There is something special that happens when the right motions are put to a song.  All of the sudden that song is even more powerful, but "pointless" motions can have the opposite effect on a song.  I once did a musical where we had to redo nearly every motion in every song because they literally did not go with the words being sung.  In order for them to be helpful, they need to apply.  If you are trying to sing about being joyful, then making a frowning face is not going to be a good choice.  But neither is jumping up and down for "joy" appropriate if the song is slow.  Which motions you choose are as important as which song you choose.  So, when creating motions for your music, make sure they add to the worship experience and not just fill space in the song.

If done properly and prayerfully...motions in music can be a huge asset to your ministry.

Until next week!

CM Conference 2016

Last year, my friend and I attended the CM Conference in Louisville, KY and it was an amazing experience.  So this year, I was doing all I could to spread the word so that more people I knew would be able to attend.  This year, I attended with 4 other people and we had a spectacular time.  Not only is the conference extremely well done, but it is affordable.

No, really...it is actually affordable.   This conference does everything it can to be accessible to people from all church sizes.  They start with a low price and then if that is still too much, they have scholarships that you can apply for to cover part or sometimes even all of the cost.  The way the leadership at the CM Conference genuinely care about under served churches is a blessing that is hard to describe.

So, what is attending the conference like?  Well, it's 4 days, includes 4 amazing and inspiring worship services, 12 Workshop opportunities (with over 90 workshops to choose from), has a cool exhibit area that gives you the opportunity to learn about and/or buy helpful ministry tools, and to top it off, it allows you to connect with people who work with children from around the world. There were folks there from Canada, Iran, Australia, New Zealand, and India...and those are just the ones I saw or connected with.  What a blessing to hear/see how God is moving all around the world!

I was given the opportunity to present a workshop at the conference this year and what an honor that was.  Mine was "Children's Ministry on a Shoestring Budget" and I thoroughly enjoyed leading it.  If you would like the handout, I'd be glad to send it to you, just send me a note.  I also attended some  amazing workshops including, "Handling Trauma filled Children in your Kids Ministry" (full of wonderfully useful information and led by Darren Washausen), "Gospel-Based Entertainment: How to use Crazy Games and Skits to Share Jesus" (led by Jon Wicks and very very well done), two workshops led by Tim Cleary titled "Why the Church Needs Digital Disruption" and "As You Wish - Recapturing the Power of Storytelling in Children's Ministry" both of which were great and gave me much to think about, and Trisha Peach led an incredible one called "Standing up to Bullying in the Church." I could go on and on.  All of the workshops I attended gave me something to think about and helped me grow in my ministry.  There were literally workshops about just about every aspect of Children's Ministry.

If you missed this year's conference, all is not lost.  The workshops were recorded and you can purchase them through the CM Connect website for just $2 a piece!  There are in process of being added so it may take a few days for them to all be there, but I'm excited about that because there were several workshops that I wanted to attend, but had to choose between onsite.  I'm looking forward to purchasing them soon.

So, do yourself a favor, check out a couple of the workshops from this year and then sign up to attend next year.  You will be so glad you did.

Until next week!