Everyone is sick!!! What do I do?

We have all had those moments when we think we have everything ready for an upcoming service when all of the sudden it seems the plague has hit the children's department and all of your volunteers call in sick at the last minute.  Ok, it probably wasn't all of them, but it sure seemed like it at the time.  Those times can be incredibly stressful, but hopefully you will find the following tips helpful to make those services a bit less problematic.

First: Always have a back up plan
Have an idea of what you will do in the instances that someone calls in sick.  For example, if my Preschool teacher calls in sick, I know that I will simply bring the preschool in to my regular children's church service.  I may need to add an extra activity or modify a game so they can play, but it is a workable fix in a pinch.  The Sunday School teachers know that if a teacher doesn't show up, they may have kids who are a grade older or younger than their normal classes for that one Sunday.  It's not a perfect plan, but it works when unforeseen incidents occur.  Plan for your own department, what is your "Plan B" for when a volunteer is sick.

Second: Have a back up lesson ready for each area
There are lots of "one time" lessons that fit in any time of the year.  Pick one you like and put it together as if someone other than you were going to lead it.  Make sure that it has any craft supplies, copies, or object lesson items with it.  Then set it aside in a folder or a box (depending on how much stuff is needed for the lesson) that can be easily pulled out if you wake up some Sunday and you are the one who is ill.  It doesn't have to be fancy, but it should be complete.  Then you can call up one of your volunteers and say, "Fran, I'm horribly ill this morning.  Would you and Nancy fill in for me?  The lesson is all ready and in the box labeled IF PASTOR IS ILL next to the filing cabinet in my office.  Everything you need is in the box.  Thank you so much."   If you have volunteers who lead concurrent services with yours (preschool, preteen, etc), ask them to put together a similar box for their own services that can be pulled out if they are ill or called away for some other emergency.

Third:  Have a list of substitutes you can call
Not everyone is willing to be a consistent volunteer in the children's department, but there are probably a few people in your church who help with special events and would be willing to substitute in emergencies.  In my church, all volunteers need to have background checks and go through a child abuse prevention training course. Because that is the case, we can not just ask anyone to fill in.  So, having a list of names who have been through the training and are already background checked is a huge blessing.  Many of those who have taken the training to be a part of a special event (like Vacation Bible School or Camp) are also very willing to step in if I need them in a pinch.

It's never easy when we get those last minute calls telling us that someone will be gone, but with a little preparation, those calls don't have to be quite as scary to deal with.  

Until next week! 

Crafts...

I am not a very crafty person.  Don't get me wrong, I like crafts, but I'm not great at creating them.  Plus, many times they are expensive if you have to purchase supplies for very many kids.  So, in order to be cost effective, I usually only do a craft on Sunday Morning (our biggest service) if it is a special event or project, or if I found one that was inexpensive and provided a needed way to enforce the day's lesson.

However, some children learn better by doing something like a craft or a project as opposed to simply listening or watching a lesson.  So, it is important that we find ways to include crafts in our lessons from time to time.  Below, you will find a few places where I have found inexpensive and fun ideas to use.

Hobby Lobby
Hobby Lobby has amazing sales.  If you know you are going to be needing a craft for an upcoming lesson, you may want to watch their ads.  If you download their free app, you will regularly get a 40% off coupon you can use if the item you need is not on sale.  I always do at least a few crafts around the holidays, and if I go there directly after those holidays I can get the next year's craft for very little money.  It's awesome!  

Dollar Tree
Dollar Tree stores have great craft supplies for very little money.  Things like decorative rocks, glass vases, tissue paper, craft sticks and more can generally be found there for $1.  It's a great place to restock your essential craft closet supplies.   

Oriental Trading 
I love this website!  It has all sorts of crafts (and prizes and decorations) for very little money.  It's a huge blessing for my budget.  As an added bonus, they are dependable in their shipping.  I know that generally I will get whatever I order in less than a week even if I don't pay for expedited shipping. 

 Pinterest 
I have lost count of the number of times that I have stopped at Pinterest and found just the craft or object lesson idea I needed!  Plus, often the people who are posting these ideas are also on a tight budget so generally you can easily find ideas that are easy on your wallet as well.

Those are a few of my favorite spots for craft ideas and supplies.  I'd love to hear where you've found  bargains. 

Until next week!  Have a very Merry Christmas!!!

 
 

Hospital visits

Hospitals are familiar places for pastors. We visit them often, but when you go to visit a child in the hospital or the immediate family of the child...it's a little different. So, this week, I want to share a couple tips for those times.

Smile
More than likely the child in the hospital is nervous or afraid. Hospitals can be scary places for kids, so it's important that you bring comfort and cheer if you can. Remind them that God is taking care of them and pray for them while you are in the room. And, if possible, leave the child smiling.

Take a small gift
When I am out shopping, I look for small items that I can keep in my office to take to kids when I visit them in hospitals. Small stuffed animals, simple toys, or activity books can bring some joy to a child. It doesn't have to be expensive, just something they can play with while they are recuperating.

If it's serious...
Most of the time, kids go into hospitals for common procedures like having tubes put in their ears, setting a broken arm or leg, or some other procedure that might entail a short stay. But sometimes, it is more serious. Sometimes you may have a child that is facing a chronic or even deadly disease like cancer, cystic fibrosis, muscular dystrophy, or any number of other things. When that happens, the previous two tips are appropriate, but know that this child probably knows more about doctors and procedures than you ever will. Their treatments, while not pleasant, are a part of their lives at this point in time and should be treated as such. Often, they really want to "just be like other kids", so treat them like that. Don't ignore their illness, but when you can, don't make it the focus either. Show them compassion and love and remind them often that God is with them.  They get tired of being the "sick kid," so do all you can to just let them be a kid.

I'm not an expert on these matters, but these are things that have been helpful for me.

Until next week...

Making Missions Memorable

My parents were Missionaries for a time and while they were stationed in Nairobi, Kenya, I found out what it meant to have family literally on the other side of the world.  Not just across the country, but across the planet.  At the time, I was living in Sacramento, CA and if you pulled out a globe and put one finger on my city and one finger where my parents were, they were almost exactly opposite sides of the world.   Until then, though I had always liked learning about missions and was proud of our mission programs, I didn't really understand what it might be like for those on the mission field who were so far away from their loved ones.  I decided that we would make Mission Education a much bigger part of the Children's Department than it had been up to that point.  Here are a few of the things I have done to help our Mission Lessons have a more memorable impact.

1) Adopt a Missionary Family
In our denomination, each church is given the name of one or two Missionaries that they can connect with on a regular basis.  Because I went to college with a few people who became Missionaries and also through my parents, I have the honor of knowing some of our Missionaries personally.  Because I do, it makes news about the things happening in their areas of the world stand out and makes me more connected with what they are doing.  I want our kids to have that connection too.  So, every once in a while, we will adopt a missionary family and the kids send them letters or packages, we Skype during a service (when the time difference allows) and they love getting to know the people who are living in another country.  You can even connect via your Children's Ministry Facebook or Twitter feeds too.  We try to stay in regular contact for at least a year.   It's a great way to make missions come alive in a very real way.  

2) Mission Stations  
I am a huge fan of using hand-on activities to connect the kids with a particular lesson.  Several years ago, I created some stations for my department that specifically taught about different sorts of missionaries.  Each station had an activity that taught the basics of what that type of missionary would be doing.  For example, at the medical missions station the kids played "Operation."  At the station for translators the kids had to decipher coded messages. (I realize that is not exactly translating, but it got the point across.)  The Work and Witness station (These are short term mission trips where those on the trip tend to build or do repairs on buildings), the kids built a picture frame in the shape of a house using popsicle sticks or they painted a sun catcher. There were about 9 stations total, but you could do as many or as few as you like.  

3) Mission Lessons and Prayer Stations  
Several years ago I wrote a series called "Mission Possible" where each week we would look at a specific country and learn about the mission work and Missionaries in that country as well as what it would be like to live in that country.  I included a game popular with the children from that part of the world as well.  At the end of each lesson, the kids rotated through simply prayer stations meant to remind them of the things we had talked about and help them pray for each area we mentioned.  It was a lot of fun and the kids really enjoyed learning about each country and how God was moving in those places.  

I hope you find these ideas helpful.  If you've done a mission's lesson or program that your kids loved, I'd enjoy hearing about it, so please feel free to leave me a comment telling me all about it.

Until next week!

Using Ordinary Objects in Ministry

It might seem like a small thing, but this week I want to encourage you to use as many every day items as you can in your ministry.  Why?  Because those items that we see every day can make a huge impact when they are used in an object lesson or a sermon.  Allow me to elaborate on what I mean.

A few weeks ago, I mentioned doing a Sermon in a Sack during our Family Sunday services.  During this time of the service, one child brings in a mystery object and I have to come up with a brief sermon about whatever they brought.  I don't see the object until it's time for the sermon and the curiosity about what is in the sack is part of the fun.  I've done this in almost every church I've ministered in and this is what I find happens:

1) The adults look forward to finding out what is in the sack as much as the kids do.

2) The kids start getting picky about what they will put in the sack because THEY start getting reminded of Bible stories by what they see.  (Example, "We can't put that toy food in the sack because remember God provided food for the Israelites." "Tommy, don't put a boat in the sack, remember Jesus was in a boat when He calmed the storm.")  They want to stump me, so they figure if they think of a story associated with the object that I will easily come up with one too.

3) The adults will start trying to figure out what Biblical truth can be taught from the object too...and often it is different than what I used.  I know because they come up to me after the service and tell me what they were reminded of by the object. 

Do you see what I'm getting at?  The kids and the adults start seeing what God can teach us through those every day objects even before I ever open my mouth.  The same can be said when an ordinary object is used in a planned object lesson or as part of a sermon.  Every time the kids see that object, there is the potential that they will be reminded of the Biblical truth that it was used to teach.  And, perhaps even more important, they will start looking for what God can teach them through the ordinary items that surround them in their lives.

This doesn't mean that we shouldn't use unusual objects in our ministry.  I just wanted to remind you of the amazing tools of ministry those ordinary objects can be.

Until next week...

Encouraging words

You walk into the church on a Sunday morning and find that you've forgotten the prop you needed for your object lesson.  You quickly go to your plan B which is a craft to reinforce the lesson instead.  Then, when you go to make the copies you need for the craft, you find the copy machine is down and you have no way of fixing it.  Once you finally get your Plan C in place with 30 minutes left before the kids arrive and you walk into the Children's Church room to find that all the chairs that you had set out for service the day before have vanished because someone needed them for their event the night before and didn't return them.  So, you run to the other side of the building to get your chairs back and finally get them in place with just enough time to get the computer up and running with your pre-service videos.  Finally...ready for church...then you get the text from your Preschool teacher saying that she won't be there because she woke up vomiting.   You quickly put Plan D into action, which includes the preschool staying with the rest of the children for Children's Church, plant your smile on your face, say a quick prayer asking God for help to get through this crazy day and march on with Children's Church.

This, my friend, is Children's Ministry.  And while, thankfully, it is not always that hectic, those days do come. And when they do, sometimes all we want to do is go home and hide.  Or perhaps throw in the towel and get a less stressful job (like joining the bomb squad as an old cartoon once said).  But really all we need is a little encouragement.  A few words from someone to remind us that we are doing a good job and that things are not always as crazy as they are at the moment.

Several years ago, someone I was working with passed along to me some really good advice that had been given to him years before.  He told me to put together an encouragement file.  Basically, it is a place where you put things that you have been given that encouraged you.  It could be a picture from one of the kids that says, "I love you Pastor," a Scripture that really spoke to you,  or a card you received from a parent telling you that they appreciated the work you did on an event.  Perhaps an email that you printed out from your Senior Pastor telling you that he/she appreciated the extra hours you put in for such and such a program is in the file or maybe it includes a note you wrote yourself reminding you of the date that a specific child found the Lord.  It really can be anything, but it must be something that you can go you and it reminds you why you are in Children's Ministry.  Then on those especially hard days, you can go to your folder and flip through those words and allow God to use them to encourage you once again.

Then, you can sit down and write a note encouraging someone else.  After all, you have just been a recipient of how positive words can turn your day around.  So maybe now it is your turn to add to someone else's "Encouragement file."  Words are powerful.  We should use them to encourage one another often.

Until next week!

A Few Thoughts on Bullying...We Adults are part of the problem.

There are many things that we try to teach as Children's Ministers.  But, more an more I am seeing that we, ourselves, have to be very careful, especially online, if we do not want to harm our own witness.

If you have been online, listening to the radio, or watching the news over the last few years you would see that there has been a huge surge of people speaking out against bullying. And rightly so because it is a huge problem in our society.  Those of us who work with children and teenagers know that it happens.  It's terrible and it's hurtful and it MUST STOP!  Everyone seems to agree with this...until it is time for the elections.

Then it seems that adults all across the country decide that bullying is ok.  After all, the people they are talking about are politicians.  They made themselves fair game, right?  WRONG!  They decided to run for a political office.  They decided to try and make a difference in our country.  They did not decided that they and their family were just going to be "ok" with being bullied.

No matter what our political affiliation, this blog applies to everyone...and I'm talking to the politicians and even the news reporters too. There is a difference between a news story and a smear campaign for ratings.  If we want to teach our children that bullying is wrong, then we have to stop it ourselves.

And while I'm on the subject, this applies to sporting events too.  How many times have we seen someone post something about how they are so glad so and so was fired, or how "Mr. Sports Star" is doing such a lousy job in their sporting event.  Seriously???  

How do we explain why it is ok for us to verbally torture, tear down, and post embarrassing pictures of a politician or a sports star, but it's not ok for our kids to do it of a classmate?  Do we realize what we are doing to the family of that person?  How would you like it if your Mom, Dad, Aunt, or Uncle was being torn down all over the internet by people who had never even met them?  Do you know for an absolute fact that what you are saying is true?  Even if you do, why is it ok for you to post such things about this person while at the same time you are trying to teach your children and teenagers that it is not ok for them to do the same to others?

This is a horrible and tragic double standard that MUST STOP.  Children learn by example.  What kind of example are we setting?

If you don't like a particular politician, don't tear him or her down.  Build up your candidate.  Show off all his or her good points.  I don't care why you don't like the other candidate...tell me why you DO like yours.  Is that so hard?  Or do you really not know enough about your candidate to do that? 

If you are unhappy about how a sports personality is playing their game, don't tear them down, focus on something positive you can say or simply don't say anything at all. Perhaps highlight someone else on the team who is doing well.

We are being watched and our online lives are often have an even bigger impact than our offline lives.  Why?  Because people all across the world have access to seeing what we put online.  But only those literally around us see our real life actions.  How does it look if they see us praising God with our mouths at church and tearing down people online?  What about those who post Scripture about how God loves everyone one minute and then how they hate such and such a candidate the next?  Do we not see how our witness is being damaged?

Before you post something, put your name, or better yet, your child's name in the place of the person you are ready to post about.  Would you still post it? If not, then DON'T POST IT.  Don't SHARE it.  And just because you think it's funny doesn't mean it's not cyber-bullying.  Remember...that person is someone's child, so don't do to them, what you wouldn't want done to your child.  Is that really so hard? 

I know this is different than  the tips I usually post, but this is a topic that is simply too important to ignore.  And as we all know, our actions speak much louder than our words and that applies both to Children's Ministry and to life in general.

Until next week...

* This is an updated version of posts I wrote for my other blog a few years ago.  However, with this ever increasing social media world, I felt it was important to share my thoughts here as well.

Choosing Bibles for Kids...

One question that I am often asked is "What kind of Bible should I get my child?"  It's a really good question, but the answer is going to be different for every child.  But here are a couple tips that I have found useful.

1) No matter the age of the child, if they are planning to take the Bible to church with them, buy them a regular Bible.  By regular, I mean not a "Story Bible".  Here's why.  In most Children's Church services, the Pastor or Leader will read from a certain verse or passage of Scripture and invite the children to follow along.  If the child brings a storybook Bible or toddler Bible to the class, there is no way for them to find that verse or for anyone else to find it for them in their Bible.  This often causes the child distress because they were so excited that they had a Bible with them, but now they are being told that they can not use it because it doesn't have the scripture being read in it.  It is very confusing and frustrating for them.  A kid-friendly Bible is wonderful, just make sure it has all the books and verses in it if they are planning to take it to church.

2) Storybook Bibles are great for use at home or in your devotional time with your child.  Young children enjoy the pictures and are much more likely to read that kind of Bible on their own.  There are lots of different kinds.  I encourage parents to check out a nearby Christian Book Store and simply read through some.  The parents will know which type will appeal to their child better than I will.

3) Comic Book Bibles are awesome for kids who are just learning how to love reading.  They bring the stories to life in a new and different way and really engage them in reading Scripture.  I highly recommend them for children in 1st - 4th grade.  Even some preteens really enjoy a comic book Bible.  There are several versions out there and some look more like a graphic novel than a comic book.  The graphic novels tend to have a darker look and feel to them, so be aware of that if you choose that kind.  It could be a little scary for young readers.

4) As for the version of Scripture to choose...Honestly, I think you should choose whatever your child will understand best.  Most 8 year olds probably aren't going to be very excited about reading the King James Version because it's hard to understand, but if that is your choice, then that is fine.  I generally recommend the New International Version or the Contemporary English Version because they are easily understood by most children.  If you go to www.biblegateway.com you can put in any Scripture and easily see how it is read in many different versions.

Choosing a Bible for a child is awesome, but if they are old enough to read, you might consider taking them with you and letting them pick out their own.  It is more likely they will read a Bible they got to choose themselves.  But whether they pick it out themselves or you surprise them with one, owning their own Bible is very special and opening the mind of a child to the Word of God is priceless!

Until next week!

Reports and Budgets

Not many of us enjoy doing reports or making out budgets for our department, but they are an important part of ministry.  Reports (for me, Board Reports) give our governing body an idea of what is happening in your department, and budgets give you the funds you need...or at least let you know what you have to work with.  However, when I was first starting out in ministry, I was unfamiliar with how to write either one of these papers. Fortunately, my Dad had been writing both for years and he helped know what should be in each one.  So, this week, I will share a couple of tips that he gave me as well as a few that I've figured out over the years that have helped me where writing budgets and reports are concerned.


REPORTS
In my denomination (Nazarene), I am expected to turn in a report each month to our Church Board.  This is very important because, for the most part, none of the Board will have been in my Children's Department during any of our services.  If I want them to be aware of what God is doing, what series we are studying, or how many children are involved, then I need to make sure that is in the report. So, here is a simple breakdown of what is generally in my monthly Board Reports.
     1) What we did last month - This is a brief overview of the events or programming you want to highlight from that last month.  How many attended the events, were there any conversions in your services, how many new children are attending and any other pertinent information. 
     2) What is coming up this month - Make sure they are aware of what you are planning the the days ahead.  
     3) Upcoming large events - It may only be August, but if you are beginning to prepare for your Annual Christmas program, the Board needs to know.  Keep them informed.
     4)  Who is helping you - Throughout your report, give credit where it is due.  Make sure you mention the names of those who are helping you consistently or have been of special help in the last month.  
      5) What have YOU been up to - The last paragraph of my report is always a highlight of my activities for the month.  Be detailed where you can.  This is not to say that you need to list every single thing you did, but let them know the basics.  An example might be: 
In the last month I attended 3 staff meetings, prepared and led 4 Wednesday night services, attended a workshop on Children's Ministries, made two hospital calls, prepared and led 4 Sunday Morning services, prepared the monthly newsletter, led one Children's Council meeting and one Kingdom Crew meeting, met with one potential volunteer, as well as completing regular office duties. 

Being detailed each month will help you if you have to fill out an end of the year report. Recording how many times you preached over the course of a year or how many hospital calls you made over the last twelve months is easy if you have been detailed in your monthly report.  But it also helps your Church Board to know what you do throughout your working hours. Ministry is unlike most 9-5 jobs and they need to know what you spend your time doing.  

Budgets
When you put together your yearly budget, there is a fair amount of guesswork involved, but if you keep decent records throughout the year and stay in touch with your church treasurer, you can simplify the process a bit.  The easiest thing to do is to make a list of all the things you will need to purchase over the course of the year and give each one a line item.  (Examples: Christmas Musical, Curriculum, Trunk N' Treat, Easter Eggstravaganza, Volunteer Appreciation, Camp, Publicity, etc) After you have made your list, go through your records and see what you spent last year on those items and make adjustments for the coming year.  For example, if last year you spent $100 on your publicity, but you know that you are doing an extra event this year, perhaps put $125 in the budget this year.  If you spent $500 on your Christmas Musical last year, but are planning to borrow a musical from another church this year, perhaps you only ask for $250 this year.  Take into account what your plans for the coming year as well as what you spent the year before to come up with the budget you submit.  

When you submit your budget, be prepared to have it cut when it comes back to you.  Some people take it as a personal affront when the budget for their department is cut, but the reality is that the finance committee will have to cut in many places in order to come up with a workable budget for the church, so be prepared to receive less than you asked for. It's not that they don't like you or don't think that children's ministry is important.  Generally it is simply that they have to make sure every area is covered with the funds allotted.  Yours won't be the only one cut and you will simply have to do the best you can with what the church can give you. So be gracious about your budget being cut.  No one likes to take away funds from ministries within the church, but we need to work together to make what we have work for our department.  Remember,  as the old song says, "Little is much when God is in it!"

Reports and budgets may not be the most exciting part of being in ministry, but it is no less vital to what we do.  I hope these tips make writing them a bit easier.

Until next week! 

Christmas Time is Near...

I love Christmas.  It is, by far, my favorite holiday.  However, in ministry, it is an extremely chaotic time of year. And you start planning for it in January (yes...January), so Christmas prep is sort of always on the back burner throughout the year.  However, there are a few things you can do, to hopefully lessen the chaos and make this very special time of year a bit less stressful.

Don't plan many activities during the month of December.  At my church we do three things in December and only one is not during a regular service time.  The Christmas Musical, our Angel Brunch, and a Birthday Party for Jesus. 

The Angel Brunch is held on a Saturday and it is literally a brunch where the children bring their Grandparents (or a Grandparent they adopt for the day if their own are not available).  We do an angel craft, have someone dress up like an angel for pictures, play angel themed games, and the "Angel" reads a special Christmas Story to the kids.  It's not work intensive, but it is a lot of fun and the families always enjoy this special time.  It generally lasts no longer than an hour and a half, so it doesn't take up much of the people's time during this busy time of year. 

Our Birthday Party for Jesus is always the Sunday right before Christmas.  That particular Sunday is one of the most unpredictable of the year as far as numbers are concerned because sometimes you may have far fewer kids (they have left to visit family) or you may have far more children (those in town to visit family).  This birthday party is great because it works whether you have 10 kids or 50 kids.  On this day, we have an actual birthday party and try to incorporate as many different things that would be done at any child's birthday party.  We have party games, goodie bags for each child (filled with "Happy Birthday Jesus" items when we can), prizes, music, cupcakes or birthday cake and more.  We also include a time to tell the Christmas story in some way.  In fact, all of the games tell parts of the Christmas Story as much as possible.  For example, instead of "Pin the Tail on the Donkey" we might play "Put Baby Jesus in the Manger".  If we play musical chairs, all the music will be Christmas Carols of some sort.  You can find lots of games this fit this idea on Pinterest.   The Christmas Story might be told through a video, by having the kids act it out, or various other ways.  We will have been studying the Christmas Story prior to the party so this is a review more than a full blown lesson.  But, here is my thinking about this party...if we would give a party to a child to celebrate their birthday, how much more appropriate is it to plan a Birthday Party for the Savior of the World.  It's fun and it reinforces that Christmas is when we celebrate Jesus' birthday.  It is one of my favorite days of the year in Children's Church. Also, if you happen to be gone on this Sunday, this is an easy Sunday to have your volunteers lead.  Make sure they have all the supplies and that everything is ready to go, but they can easily fill in on this day if needed.  Even the most shy volunteer generally is ok leading a game even when they might not feel comfortable teaching a full blown lesson.     

About the Christmas musical/program:  If you are doing a Christmas program or musical, my advice is to schedule the performance on the first Sunday of December.  It might seem early for a program, but most of the time, if you wait longer to do it, you will start clashing with the practices and programs the children have at school.  Doing the program early keeps the schedule clashing to a minimum and  will also put your biggest event behind you early on.  Christmas musicals/programs take more time and effort than most people realize and if you do yours early, you will have time to recuperate before you begin celebrating with your family.

That's all for now.  Until next week! 

You are not alone.

I really do not know who reads this blog, but I know there are people from many parts of the world.  I don't know who you are or where you live, but I want you to know that you are not alone.  We who work with children are a much larger group than perhaps you even realize.  This week I want to encourage you to connect with at least one other children's worker near you.  Go for coffee, send a text, or maybe chat over a walk in a park.  It doesn't really matter what you do, but take the time to connect.  We are an easily isolated group, but isolation isn't good, so branch out.  Check with your denomination.  Are there any conferences or workshops you can attend this year that will connect you with other Children's Pastors/Directors/Volunteers from your denomination? Or perhaps a non-denominational conference will be in your area soon. Check it out if you can.

What brings this to my mind?  Well, this week I am in Lenexa, Kansas attending the IGNITE Conference which is the only national Children's Leadership Convention for the Church of the Nazarene (my denomination).  Being here reminds me of how important being able to connect with other like minded children's workers is.  This week will be filled with workshops, church services, and fun times that will help us with our respective ministries.  However, for me, the most impactful time at conferences like these are the times that are unscheduled.  When we just get to chat, connect, laugh, and encourage one another.  I enjoy the worship services and the workshops, but sometimes what I long for is simply the chance to connect with other Children's Pastors.  It refreshes my soul and touches my heart in ways nothing else really can.

But here is why I bring this up.  I generally don't realize how much I needed to connect with other Children's Pastors until I get to a conference like this one.  And when I arrive, it hits me how isolated I have been.  Isolation is not good. But it is something that we can easily fall into.  So my advice to you is to be intentional about connecting.  You will be amazed how much it can change your ministry and nourish your soul.

Until next week!

Fun Family Ideas

In Family Ministry, we are always looking for fun ways to connect our families to each other and that can be a challenge in this busy day and age.  But below are a couple fun things that I have done that are not expensive, offer a cool way to connect, and are specifically for families (as opposed to just dropping off the kids).

Family Picnic
If your city has a park, and most do, this is an easy way to connect your families. Pick a day and do a Family Picnic.  Have each family bring their own lunches and then pick a spot and eat together.  You can rent a shelter house, but it's not really necessary if there is a place with an outdoor picnic area.  After they eat, either the kids can play on the park playground while the parents chat, or your can plan some fun games to do as a group.  Because each family brings their own lunch, there is really no cost involved for this event, and except for the games (if you choose to plan them) there is very little prep.  It's truly a win/win activity.  Lots of fun without adding a lot of work to your schedule.

Family Game Night
There are a few ways you can do this.  The first, is to set out a lot of table type games and allow the families to play these with refreshments, music, and perhaps some fun videos.  Easy, and not really any different than they could do at home, however, not all families take the time to play games at home. Plus it gives families opportunities to connect with other families in a laid back pleasant atmosphere which is always a good thing.

The second way, is to provide family vs. family games and give out prizes to the winners.  To do this, each family is a team and the teams compete against each other in games such as "Name that Tune", "Jeopardy", "Concentration", or "Family Feud".  Admittedly, these games can be very time consuming to plan and put together, so make sure you have plenty of time to prepare.  You will have to come up with the questions or puzzles for each game and that can be work intensive, however it is worth noting that there is a Family Feud Card game that can be purchased and has tons of questions and answers already done.  When I create these games, I try to do it in such a way that neither the parents or the children could win without the help of the other.  So, for example, when we play Name That Tune, not only will I include music from the parent's growing up years, but also music that we sing only in Children's Church...that way they have to work together.  We also have a game where we give each team a random assortment of objects and ask them to create something with them.  This year we gave each team objects that included, a piece of rectangular cloth, a small box of colored clay, a variety of lengths of yarn, rocks, beads, pipe cleaners, and a few other things and asked them to come up with a diorama of something that they did as a family.  I am always amazed at how creative the results of this activity are.  It was truly awesome to see!  As for the prizes, they are always something that promotes another time of family activity.  Perhaps a board game, a puzzle, a family movie, or even the components for them to make cookies as a family.   

The third way to do this, is to create life size versions of games such as LIFE or Candyland and let the families play with each person being their own game piece. This would also be rather work intensive, and while I have yet to try this, I have no doubt that it would be an awesome memory for the families who participated. I mean, who wouldn't love to play a life size version of a favorite game?

We who work in Children's Ministry are often cut off from the other parts of the church simply because we are with the children so much.  Both of these activities promote times of fun with the whole family and also allows them to interact with other families. Plus it gives us the opportunity to be with the family as a unit instead of just with the children.  And if we really want to minister to the whole family, we have to find ways to connect with the whole family...and these are good ways to do just that.  

Until next week! 

Blessed are the Flexible

I love working in Children's Ministry.  I do.  It's my passion.  I like planning out services and events and when I mean plan...I do mean plan. Everything...down to the minute.  I do not like having empty spaces in the plans.  And I want to know what is going to happen and in what order it will happen.  BUT, no matter how much I plan, no matter how meticulously I prepare, nothing ever goes according to plan.  Computers freeze up, games go faster than scheduled, sound systems go on the blink, kids are more talkative than usual.  You name it, it can happen in the course of the Children's Church service.  So, I have to be flexible.  I have to have a back up plan...and sometimes even a back up back up plan.  Flexibility is key to Children's Ministry...and actually to any sort of ministry in general.  Because ministry is by nature connected to the lives of people and life is simply unpredictable.

Now, for me, since I have grown up in a ministry family, this is a lesson learned early.  But for others, flexibility not something that they are used to and it can be tough.  So here are a couple things that can help you remain flexible...even if you are a planner like me.

Plan for change
Within my service agenda, there are generally things that I have purposely put into the program that can easily be shortened or lengthened as needed.  For examples, if I have four songs in the music section, one will be my "if necessary cut" song.  I can easily skip it if time is short.  An extra game could be put into the agenda if you need a time filler.  For me, I have a review game that I can easily put together if I need to expand the service.  Crafts are great, but they can take an enormous amount of time, so if I am using one, I am prepared to cut something else in the lesson, if it is necessary.  

Have a technology back up plan
If your computer has issues or if your sound system is on the blink, that can totally mess up your plans.  While you probably can not be prepared for every instance (after all computers are constantly changing as are the problems that can go with them), there are a few things you can do to help alleviate issues.  
1)  Make sure any video or audio you need is downloaded into your hard drive as opposed to streaming them live.  Internet issues are very common in lots of places, but if you can learn to not rely on needing things live, that can help a lot.  
2) Keep an old school CD or DVD player handy.  These can come in handy in a pinch.  If the computer isn't working, I can at least pop a cd into the player and have music.  
3) Work on projecting your voice.  I realize that not everyone has a naturally booming voice and many people use microphones during services.  But, if the sound system is on the fritz, there is only so much you can do, so practice projecting your voice, so that if it becomes necessary, you can still be heard.  Even the most timid of voices can be heard if you learn to project.  If you feel that your voice is simply too "small" to be heard without a microphone, you might consider investing in a few vocal lessons.  Voice lessons can help a great deal in this area because those who sing are taught how to breathe and project their voice in ways that will make them heard, but without straining their vocal chords.

No matter how well you plan, there is always a possibility that things will go differently than you planned.  So being flexible is necessary.  When the unexpected happens, say a prayer for wisdom and stay calm.  There is always a way to continue, but 99 times out of a hundred, it will force you to stretch.  And that's not a bad thing.  The more we stretch, the more we grow.  And the more we grow, the better ministers we will be.  So don't be afraid to be flexible...it can lead to great growth.  

Until next week!
   
 

Do you know what's popular?

One of the things kids face is a barrage of entertainment that is anything but positive.  Every year, I try to check the winners of the Teen Choice and Kid's Choice Award shows and many times I find myself shaking my head at what they are choosing as their favorites.  More often than not, the things that are winning are not kid friendly...especially where the Teen Choice Award winners are concerned.  And if the teens are watching or listening to it, their younger siblings are probably watching/listening as well.

Just like when you watch the Emmy's or the Oscars and the winner may not be your choice, it is the same way with kids and teen award shows.  Just because something wins doesn't mean all the kids in your department are watching or listening to the winner.  However, it is almost a given that they are aware of the winners and probably have friends who like that artist, television show, or movie even if they do not.  And that being the case, we need to be aware of them too.

It sounds easy...simply know what is popular in the world of children, but it's not.  It changes all the time.  What was popular last month may not be popular this month.  The band the kids couldn't get enough of  when they were in 4th grade may be uncool when they reach 5th grade. The toy that everyone had to have last Christmas is collecting dust on the shelves by February.  The game all the boys were playing on their phone in May might be deleted by August.  You could spend hours every week trying to keep up with it all and let's face it...we don't have that kind of time.  So, what do we do?

LISTEN
If the kids in your department are excited about something, they will talk about it...a lot.  What shows are they talking about watching?  What song in stuck in their head?  What books are they reading? What apps are they loving?  They may walk right up to you and say, "Do you watch __________?  I love that show!"  But we are often so busy before and after church services that we don't always hear what they are telling us.  Make a point to listen to what they are saying.  You might be surprised at what you will hear.

DO RESEARCH
A quick google search for "Teen Choice Award Winners" or "Kid's Choice Awards Winners" will bring up lots of articles about those shows.  Take a few minutes and look them over.  Take note of the artists or movies that win more than one award.  Maybe take a few minutes to look up the names of any winning artist, show, internet celebrity, or movie that you are not familiar with.  These shows also give awards for video games and social media personalities so it really is an overview of all the media that in coming at the kids.  This doesn't have to take a long time, but it can give you an idea of what is popular.

SEE WHAT THEY SEE
We may not have time to watch every television show or movie that comes out geared at kids, but we can do our best to see the ones that seem to be the most popular.  Is there a song that your kids are listening to repeatedly?  There is probably a video on YouTube of that song.  Take five minutes and watch it.  Catch at least one episode of that show they all love to watch.  The game they love to play on their phones may be a free download.  If so, try it out.  See what has made it so addictive. We may not see it all, but we can at least make an effort to know what they are seeing.  

You might not think this sort of thing is important, but here is what I've noticed over the years.  If what is important to the kids is not even on our radar, they will listen to us less.  Not because they don't like us, but because we do not seem to understand them.  If they talk to us about their favorite show and we know what it's about, or if we know who the new popular artist is on the radio, it shows them that we find their interests important...and by extension that they are important.  And if they know we find them important, they are more likely to listen to us on things that we find important...like our Bible lessons.  And they will also be willing to listen to us when we explain why we don't like the lyrics of a particular song or how the message of such and such a movie isn't appropriate.  As the old saying goes, "They have to know you care before they care what you know."

That's all for this week!   


  

Implementing Change

Change is often necessary, but hardly anyone likes change.  We may say we do, but most of us, when push comes to shove, are pretty happy with doing things like we always have.  It's comfortable.  It's known.  But, change is a part of life and especially when you go into a new place of ministry, change is inevitable.  No, doubt the people you are working with will need to implement some changes, but you must be willing to change too.  And if you implement change in the wrong way, you can ruin your ministry even before it begins.  So, here are a few tips that have proven useful for me.

Change very little in your first year.
In one of my ministry classes, this was taught as a key part of church leadership.  If you come into a new place and start to make big changes right away, you have already driven a bit of a wedge between yourself and your new congregation.  In fact there is an old pastor's saying (no idea who came up with it) that says, "If you make two big changes in your first year of ministry, the third change will be you."  And this is indeed a true statement.  We like to come in and make everything work the way WE like it...after all that means that WE won't have to change.  But, it is really much smarter to wait to implement change.  After all, for the entire first year of your ministry, you are doing everything for the first time in your new location.  You need to see how things have been done in the past before you know what is working and what is not.  That's not to say that you can't put your own spin on things, but there is no reason to fix things that are not broken. Take note of yearly events.  What is working?  What needs improvement?  Then the next time that event rolls around implement those improvements.  But don't just change things because they are different than what you normally do.  You have to see the perspective of your people before they will be interested in your perspective.

Change only what is necessary.
If you move into a new ministry position and find that there are no safety procedures in place, that is something that needs to be changed as quickly as possible.  If you see that there is not a sign-in/sign-out area for the department, that is something that needs immediate change.  Or perhaps you find that the curriculum in use is not actually teaching the correct theology for your denomination (it happens more than you might realize), that would be a necessary change.  But if it is not a detriment to safety or the spiritual learning and growth of the children, it is probably a change that can wait. There are exceptions to this, of course, but choose wisely about what is necessary and what it simply a preference of yours.

When change is needed, do so slowly, prayerfully, and with your Senior Pastor's support.
Any change you make, will probably cause some sort of ripple in the department.  Sometimes it's positive, sometimes not so much.  Make sure you pray about any big changes before you implement them.  Is this what the Lord is leading for this church?  Or is it simply what you want?  If it is the latter, your chance of failing is pretty much off the charts, but if God is behind it, you are already ahead of the game. However, when you find it necessary to implement changes, make sure your Senior Pastor is supportive.  More than likely, if folks don't like the change, the Senior Pastor will hear about it before you do and you want him or her to understand, and be able to explain the changes people are seeing.  You need their support, so keep them in the loop.  And when you do make a change, you need to be able to explain why it was necessary.  "Because I like it better this way," is not going to be a good enough reason and neither is, "We did it like this at my last church and it was great."  You need to be able to show your people why, at this church, this change was needed.  If they understand the reasons, they will be more likely to embrace the change.

Make sure your Children's Council is on board with the changes.
These people are the backbone of your Children's Ministry and if they are not on board with any changes, no one else will be either.  Talk to them.  Get their advice.  And once you have come up with the strategy to implement the necessary changes, let them help you institute it.  They are also a great way to hear what others are saying.  Complaints (especially those about you or something you are in charge of) will often go to your team but not to you.  So, make sure your team knows that you want to know what they are hearing...good or bad.  Then be sure to listen to that feedback and make further adjustments if they are needed.

Change is never easy, but if you take your time, are prayerful in your decisions, and listen to those around you if can be done without too many problems.

When You Hit A Wall...

There are times in ministry where you get tired.  Planning services, preparing events, paperwork, problem solving, working with people...it can easily become overwhelming after awhile. And when it does, it is hard to get any creative juices flowing.  You sit and stare at your computer and not a single idea comes to you.  You read your Bible and instead of something triggering an idea for a lesson, the words just sort of run together. Your "To Do" list seems to get longer and longer because you simply can not seem to concentrate long enough to accomplish what you want to do.  You, my friend, have hit a wall.

First, let me assure you that you are normal.  This happens to all of us from time to time.  I love what I do.  I can not imagine doing anything else, but let's be real here, ministry is one of the hardest jobs anyone can have. For all the jokes about preachers working only one day a week, we know that it is at times a grueling marathon.  So mental, physical, and emotional fatigue are all things we have to watch out for and deal with.

Now, lets talk about some ways to get passed the wall and move on.

Take a break!
You're body is telling you that it needs some rest.  Listen to it.  Have you taken a vacation in the past year?  Are you working too many hours?  Have you been taking your day off?  We Pastors are notorious for working too much.  Many see their days off as optional and vacations are few an far between, not because we are not given vacation days, but because we feel guilty about being away from our flock.  But times of rest and refreshment are not something you can do without.  If you have vacation days, use them.  If you can't get away at the moment, then make sure you are taking your day off.  You would be surprised how helpful even a few hours away can be to getting past a wall.  

Get out of your routine.
I say this as one who LOVES routine.  I want to know what I'm doing and when I'm supposed to do it.  I plan out my days and get a bit stressed when things get out of whack.  But, when I hit a creativity wall, sometimes doing something out of the norm will help me a lot.  It might be going to a store and looking for object lesson ideas (Dollar Tree and Hobby Lobby are two of my favorites for this activity), or perhaps taking a drive to a Christian Book Store that I do not normally frequent and simply browsing it's merchandise.  Before I go into the store, I simply breathe a prayer like, "Lord, show me something I need to see," or "Please speak to me," and then when I go into the store, I look purposely for something God can speak to me through.  And, let me tell you, it is amazing the things God will sometimes speak to me through.  A random item could spawn an entire lesson idea or the perfect craft will be sitting there waiting on me.  God is always trying to speak to us and when you actively listen, you may be amazed at what He will show you.  Usually, when in stores, I'm a woman on a mission to get a task accomplished, but this shopping trip is different.  The mission is simply to hear from God, and that is an entirely different experience.  But it never fails to refresh my soul and kick my creativity into gear.  Perhaps, you would enjoy an outdoor activity or a drive.  Whatever you choose, simply ask God to speak to you and then really listen for his still small voice to respond.  It may just come from a place you least expected it.

Find an accountability partner.
Ministry is emotionally draining and we need someone we can talk to who will encourage us, pray for us, and keep us accountable.  This person should be someone you trust fully and someone you can confide in.  Perhaps a pastor from another church or a friend outside your current ministry.  But this person needs to be someone who will ask you questions like, "How's your devotional life?" "Did you take your day off this week?" "Are you spending too many hours in the office?" "How's your walk with the Lord?" "Are you spending enough time with your family?"  We need someone who will come along side us and pray for us, but also who is willing to ask the tough questions about whatever might be taking a toll on us emotionally, physically, and/or spiritually.  I suggest another person in ministry because they will know and understand the stresses you are under, but it doesn't have to be a ministry colleague.  It should, however, be someone of the same sex as you.  If you don't have one already, I highly suggest you look for an accountability partner. 

We all get tired.  We all have those times of hitting a wall, but the important thing is that you get passed the wall.  Don't let it stay in your way.  God has big plans for all of us and we can not allow walls to get in our way.  I hope this gives you some ideas of how to get around them when they come. 

Safety First...

You probably already know this, but when you are working with children, safety must be your top priority.  Sometimes making an area safe can be a daunting task.  So daunting, in fact, that people would rather just go on as they always have, rather than even try to implement something new.  But, in this day an age, you simply can not be lax in this area.  If parents feel that their children are not being well cared for, they will not bring their children to your department.  So, if you are new at setting up safety procedures for your department, here are a couple of basic things that you probably should start with.

Sign In, Sign Out Sheet
There are lots of expensive software that you can purchase to facilitate the check in/check out area for your children's department, but if money is an issue, then create a simple sign-in/sign-out sheet for the children in your area.  At my church it has basically four columns: Child's Name (We have these already listed alphabetically by last name), Sign-In, Sign-Out, (parents put their initials or name in these columns if when dropping off or picking up their child) and a column for the name of anyone not allowed to pick up the child.  Generally that fourth column isn't used, but it is a good reminder for us to ask if we know of a custody issue within the family.

Once a child is signed in, they can not leave our area until they are signed out.  This will be the most difficult thing you will implement, because so many people are very trusting of those within their church.  That is not necessarily a bad thing, but the Sign Out part of the procedure is much more that just making sure the child leaves with the right person.  After they have signed into your area, you are responsible for that child until they are signed out.  You must know where they are until a parent or guardian signs them out.  This is the best way to make sure that they are not hurt or taken by the wrong people.  Parents do not always want to come back to pick up their children, so you may receive some push back about this at first...especially if the children grew up in the church and feel comfortable there, but be vigilant about this.  The children's safety is more important than the parent's inconvenience.  Our job is to keep them safe. 

There are lots of ways to do Check-In/Out, but this is a simple way to start. 

Background Checks and Training  
Background checks are quite simply a must for anyone who works with children.  This is not just a suggestion.  This should be a requirement and is some cases your church insurance may indeed require it of you.  Also, the law in many places also requires it.  So, if you have not done so already, PLEASE start getting background checks on everyone.  Even those who have been working in your children's department "forever" need to have this done.  It is key to making sure that the children's area is a safe one.  

Also, if you can, you need to offer training for your volunteers and staff in how to spot and how to prevent abuse of those in your care.  Ministry Safe is a fantastic and economical way to do this.  Your volunteers can go through the training in their own homes at their own speed (though it only takes around an hour if you go straight through the videos).  Then they complete a quiz that you will immediately get the results of for your records.   You can also go through the company to get your background checks and all sorts of great tips to keep your children and your volunteers safe.  I highly HIGHLY recommend it.

Never Ever Be Alone With A Child
I really can not stress this enough.  We live in an age where not only do we need to protect our children, but also our volunteers.  Never being alone with a child protects both.  There can be no question of impropriety if you are never alone with a child.  If at all possible, have two adults in every class, or at the very least have glass windows in all the doors of the rooms where you meet with children so that people can always see what is going on.  But never have less than three in a room ever.  Last week another Children's Pastor posted a blog about how this rule literally saved her ministry.  I highly encourage you to read her story HERE.
 

Safety of our children and our volunteers needs to be a priority in your department.  After all, we can not have the opportunity to teach the children about Jesus, if they are not first safe in our care. 

  

Movie Reviews "Woodlawn" and "War Room"

This is a bit different from my normal tips, but recently I was able to attend special previews of both "Woodlawn", which comes out in October, and "War Room" which opens later this month.  And, in my opinion, both of these films could be life changing for the people in our churches.  Not just our churches, but our communities...our world.  Why?  Because both movies are about the power of prayer and how God can and will move, when His people pray. 

"War Room" is coming out very soon.  In fact, it opens on August 28th.  This is the newest movie from the Kendrick Brothers, who brought us "Courageous," "Fire Proof" and "Facing the Giants."  "War Room" is a fantastic look at how prayer can change not just one person, but that person's entire family and life.  It centers on a woman whose marriage is on the rocks and whose daughter is showing the signs of living in a rocky home life.  But then an elderly lady (a spunky and funny woman who is my personal favorite character in the film), takes that woman under her wing and teaches her how to "fight on her knees," and the woman's life is changed.  Changed beyond anything she could have hoped for.  It's not an easy transformation.  Life changes are rarely simple, but when allowed to do His work, this movie shows how God can take our torn up lives and make something beautiful out of it.  Check out the trailer below.

Last night, I was able to see "Woodlawn" and this movie is amazing.  I'm not a sports fan, but I love sports movies and I love true stories.  This movie is both, so from the outset I knew I would enjoy it, but it is so much more than I had hoped for.  This movie follows an African American High School Football player and his coach as God comes in and changes not only their lives, but the lives of their team, their school and even their town.  But it starts with a movement of God on nearly the entire football team.  It was written by people who lived the story and the families of those who lived it.  So, it is a story that is close to the heart of the filmmakers and they have done their best to make it an accurate depiction of what went on.  And what went on is simply amazing.  You really have to see it to fully understand. It opens on October 16th. I simply can not recommend this film highly enough! Here the trailer for "Woodlawn."

Why do I think these films could be life changing?  Because they both deal with prayer.  God moves in such amazing ways even in the release of these two films.  The first reminds us of HOW to pray and reminds us that we must start with our own families if we want to see change.  Then the second reminds us of the far reaching effects that prayer can have on our communities if we would just do it!  Our Country is in a mess in many ways, but our God is so much bigger that our mess.  My prayer is that people would see these films and be reminded that prayer is powerful and then go to their knees and fight for our families, our churches, our communities, and our country.  And then we can watch the work the Lord will do and marvel at His greatness. 

Writing Curriculum

They say necessity is the mother of invention and that is a statement that is often true in children's ministry.  Money seems to be always very tight, so there are not always the necessary funds to purchase all the curriculum that is needed.  What to do?  Well, sometimes you have to write your own.  I LOVE writing my own curriculum, but it is important to point out that just because you enjoy a thing does not mean that it is easy to do.  So if you decide to take on this task, allow me to give you a few hints that have helped me over the years.  Keep in mind that I am, by no means an expert at this process, but the following things have proved useful so I am sharing them with you.

Pick a topic you find interesting.
I know that probably sounds too basic, but it is important.  Whatever passages of Scripture you choose, you will be spending a lot of time in them.  So, it is helpful if you choose something that you would like to study for your own growth and learning as well.  Personally, I tend to choose the lesser known stories of the Bible simply because they are lesser known.  Not only, will they be new and interesting to the children, but I get to spend time learning and growing as well.  And I get to dig deeper into those Scriptures than I might during my devotions.  I love learning new and interesting things about Scripture, and this gives me an opportunity to share the things I am learning with the children.  For example, I wrote a series out of Judges and we focused on the 7 Judges that we have the most information about.  But for the series, I needed to look into the historical time period and the culture of the day as well.  See, in my series, we put those Judges on trial in a courtroom and I wanted my "defense attorneys" and "prosecutors" to understand the Judges they were defending/prosecuting as much as they could.  These "lawyers" were people who did not normally help in children's ministry.  I gave them basic scripts that they could bring to life however they saw fit.  Doing the research and writing was a lot of fun and I really enjoyed learning about these Judges.  The kids loved the series and every week looked forward to who we were going to put on trial and who would be defending and prosecuting them.  

Pick a topic that applies to the kids in your department.
One series I wrote literally came about because I noticed that if you asked the kids in my department how you could serve God, the only answers you got back were that you had to be a pastor or a missionary.  So I wrote a series called "Extreme Faith" that highlighted people of all sorts of backgrounds and careers that God had used to do amazing things.  People like Fanny Crosby, Joni Eareckson Tada, Billy Sunday, Truett Cathy, and more.  I wanted them to see that God uses all sorts of people in all sorts of ways for His glory.  That all they needed to be was willing to be used.  

Each week another picture was added.

Edit, edit, edit.
You may find that when you write your lesson that it looks great on paper, but when you get in front of the kids...it's not working as well as you had hoped.  That's ok.  Take note of where you had difficulty and then work on that for the next lesson.  Nearly everything I've ever written got tweaked a bit after I used it once.  In a series, there are probably 6 - 8 lessons.  I guarantee that there will be one that, for whatever reason, just doesn't mesh as well as the others.  It happens.  Don't beat yourself up over it.  Learn from it, make changes, and keep writing.  

Be prepared to spend a lot of time.
This is not a quick endeavor.  Writing an entire series takes a lot of time.  Remember, you're not just coming up with the main part of the lesson, but everything that goes along with it as well.  Make sure you set aside enough time to plan it out thoroughly.  In my case, one lesson can take anywhere from  5-15 hours to prepare (depending on the amount of research needed and if I am starting from scratch or not) and includes the following:
     Music:  Music is an important part of any service and I want the songs to connect with the lesson as much as possible.
     A game: This introduces the lesson in a fun way.  For example, when we studied the life of Joni Eareckson Tada (she is a quadriplegic who, among her many talents uses her mouth to paint beautiful pictures), we played a game where the kids had to draw certain things with a pencil in their mouth.  I often get my games online or out of game books as opposed to creating them myself, but I find them an important part of the lesson.
     The main story of the lesson:  Usually this will be the Bible story, mission lesson, or whatever you have chosen to study. 
     An object lesson:  This can come in many forms.  Perhaps a video clip, a magic trick, a food you've prepared (trying foods from other countries is awesome for missions lessons) or whatever fits your series.
     A memory verse:  I usually use the same memory verse or perhaps two memory verses for an entire series.  That way I can make sure that the children really learn it well.  So the weeks that we are not learning the verse we will often play a game using it.
     A review game:  This is always the last part of the lesson and I do not always use it.  But if the adult service is running long, it is a great way to extend the lesson.

PRAY
This could have been listed first, but many times, at least for me, the thing we read last sticks with us most and prayer is the most important part of the process of creating and writing curriculum.  Listen to His leading.  Ask God to show you what the children in your department need to hear.  If you feel a check, heed it.  If you feel led to a certain passage of Scripture, use it.  God will show you what you need to focus on and give you the words you need, but you have to let Him lead the process...the whole process.  Without His participation, writing the curriculum is a futile exercise indeed. 
  
Writing your own curriculum can be a wonderful way to save money in your budget, but it takes lots of time, some creativity, and most importantly the leading of the Holy Spirit. 

Until next week! 



      

When Conflict strikes...

No one likes it.  We all try to avoid it, but conflict will creep into all our lives and ministries from time to time.  It's not pleasant, but it is something that happens.  How we react to conflict says a lot more about us than we often realize, so it is important that we handle it well.  Below are a few techniques that I've gleaned and used from various sources and workshops.  It's not a foolproof plan for stopping conflict, but hopefully it helps me deal with it in a Christ like manner.

When a person is upset with you: 
1)  Pray
       Take the situation to your Heavenly Father first and foremost. Pray for guidance in how to resolve the situation that has presented itself.

2)  Talk to your Pastor
      I have always found discussing situations with my Senior Pastor very helpful before I begin to deal with a conflict.  There are sometimes things going on that I may not be aware of that could change the way I deal with the situation.  He or She is the Shepherd of the church and getting their council is always an important step to dealing with conflict.

3)  Meet directly with the person who is upset
         Avoiding the situation rarely makes it better and often makes the problem worse.  So, when you hear of an issue, meet with the person who has the issue directly.

4)  Do not meet with them alone
        You need a third person in the room.  It is too easy for conversations to become "he said, she said" when it is just two people alone.  The third person should not necessarily take part in the conversation, but should be there to listen to both sides.  Your Pastor or a Board Member would be a good choice for this. 

5)  Listen to them. 
        Sometimes conflict can be sorted out and dealt with simply by hearing out the person who is upset.  Don't interrupt them.  Let them fully tell you what is bothering them.  Once you truly understand what the problem is, it can be dealt with easier.
  
6) Don't get angry or show offense
        It's not fun to be yelled at or have something important to you torn a part by the words of someone else, but stay calm.  The person who is upset will have difficulty staying that way, if you simply do not reciprocate their anger.   And if they do not calm down, they probably will not hear what you have to say anyway, so let them vent...then calmly respond to what they have said.  Trust me when I say that this is NOT easy, but in my experience, it is the best way to deal with someone who is truly angry about something.  After they have told you what it is they are upset about, an appropriate beginning response might be something to the effect of, "Thank you for sharing that with me.  I was unaware of the situation and I will be glad to look into it.  I'm so sorry it has upset you in this way.  Is there anything else you feel I should know?"
    
7)  Don't feed the rumor mill
         Along with conflict, rumors often begin to circulate.  Make sure they do not start or continue with you.  When I need to deal with conflict, it is my policy that no one in my church outside the situation at hand needs to know about the situation.  If it affects someone else, then they only need to know up to what it necessary for them to know.  For example, if "Martha" decides, due to a conflict, that she is not going to work in Children's Ministry any longer, then my Children's Ministry Team needs only to know from me that Martha is stepping down and we will need to replace her position.  The details of the situation do not need to be made known unless they are brought up...and even then, give as little information as possible.  Be truthful always, but unless it is truly warranted, details are rarely necessary.  And when possible, squash the rumors you hear.


There is no "one size fits all" resolution format when it come to conflict.  It comes in too many forms and fashions.  The only thing you can truly control is how you will respond to it.  These things have been helpful for me, I hope they will be for you as well.

Until next week!